”When the ground is crumbled it opens up the crack so light can shine in and wildflowers can bloom”
I have never had the ability to surrender to anything. Surrendering is giving up your power, being vulnerable and defeated. From an early age I was unable to cope with negativity. This varied from ensuring I achieved outstanding grades in school to creating the perfect make up look. I craved perfection in my life and if I didn’t attain it I would become distressed. This imposed an abundance of anxiety on me. Not only was it exhausting, but it was virtually impossible!
Everyone gets frustrated at times and sees themselves as inferior. Trying to change ourselves, wanting to be a certain way or trying to will things to be different does not work. Mindful surrender is not giving up, it is accepting and trust me that takes courage!
This life of self-acceptance is what I am trying to cultivate within myself. I need to have the ability to let go and surrender to situationships that are not within my control.
I have to remind myself that my self-worth does not depend on how others perceive me, it is how I perceive myself. Also, to remind myself that I must live my life in the way that I want.